“Donuts, is there nothing they can’t do?” – Homer Simpson
Yes, they can’t be an effective car tire replacement. Recently I had a flat right front tire on my car. I say “my car” knowing full well that it’s not officially “my car”. Yet. I’m in the process of buying my friend’s 2000 Toyota Echo. Miles on this thing you ask? 127,000.
I remember the sales pitch………. eyes now look at the ceiling while hand stroking goatee remembering……….
“This honey of a car can be yours for only $700 down and $200 a month for 48 months.”
“Wow! Where do I sign!”
Needless to say the transaction process didn’t exactly happen that way but it was funnier than the reality.
Anyhoo Any how back to the tire.
I saw the friggin’ flat tire and promptly proceeded to utter a few epithets that I won’t spell here. Being the good christian boy those choice words never left my mind. They did stay in my heart for awhile but I did calm down. This flat tire was annoying due to the fact I had a very important appointment that was supposed to take place 30 minutes later.
I knew due to traffic and my somewhat diminished physical capibilities that changing a flat tire, getting said flat fixed and then driving about 8 miles during rush hour traffic that this appointment would not be kept.
Yes it was frustrating. Frustrating I tells ya!
But, Misterlevittown just suck it up and put the donut spare on the car and get going to your appointment
Uh, no and shut up your filthy whore mouth!
I apologise for that last sentence but what’s wrong with you Sparky? You should know that donut tires were never intended to run around town. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, do not drive 16 miles (round trip) in rush hour traffic.
Doofus.
So yesterday, Wednesday, I put the friggin’ – that’s right I used “friggin’” again – donut on the car and went over to my local National Tire and Battery location and had them fix the tire.
And to top it all off I had a real pleasant surprise. I thought that I had a nail in the tire that worked it’s way all the way thru the tread so I couldn’t see it. I was wrong. It turned out the seal between the hub and actual tire was broken. Hence, air escapes it rubbery prison.
These folks reinstated the seal/wall and the air is imprisoned again. Where’s the pleasant surprise you ask? I wasn’t charged a single dime. I tried to pay because they did work on my tire and I should pay, right? Well, wrong. I said thank you and I shook the technician’s hand.
To me my friends this was a blessing.
Wait a second, maybe driving a car with a donut spare brings out the pity in auto mechanics. I have a feeling that I might have to rethink my position on the lowly donut spare.
Nah, they still suck.
