Until we meet again.

February 20, 2008 – Today my friend Felicia was buried in Greenwood Cemetary, Hamilton Township, NJ. I considered Felicia to be a sister. And she was a good one too. But, what about all the others in the family she married into? Al, her husband, a man who thought he would grow old with her? Her children, Anna and Jimmy? How about the women who married Al’s two brothers? Jenny and Tricia.

What about Jenny and Tricia?

It hit me several days ago that these two women were members with Felicia in a very select group. Women who married these very different men. Felicia with Al. Jenny with Joe. Trish with Steve. What about Jenny and Trish? These two women lost a full third of their number. They loved each other. The pain that they must be experiencing has got to be unique.

Unique and sad.

As everyone who will ever read this blog will know that Mister Levittown is truly a guy. Like all guys I find the female sex to be rather nifty and totally baffling at the same time. Wow, multi-tasking.

So, I will not begin to pretend to know what these two survivors are going through. It’s just a thought that I’ve had.

It was fairly cold and definitely gray last wednesday. The funeral mass was held at Saint Gregory’s out in Hamilton Township. Many people were there at the church. At least a hundred. I saw a family friend and his wife for the first time in at least 5 years. It was great to see Rob. I just wish it was under better circumstances. I fell in “love” with his wife the day I met her because I watched her throw one of the best spirals I’ve ever seen. What an arm. What a quarterback!

By the way, that was at least 20 years ago.

I saw for the first time in just over 21 years the woman I danced with at Al and Felicia’s wedding reception. I fell in love with Rita that day oh so many years ago. I fell in “love” with her again last wednesday. Then she introduced me to her husband and one of their three sons. I think I’ll recover. Someday.

Once again I must say that I just wish it was under totally different circumstances.

The few days before the funeral I developed a bronchial infection. I was very much afraid that I would cough during the mass and later on at the grave side. Fortunately, I coughed only occasionally and not too loudly.

The mass was a somber but also uplifting affair. The priest who officiated was the family priest. He was’nt a stranger to them . They attended that church every week.

I was fine at the church until the end of the service. The casket was being taken down the aisle from the altar with the immediate family trailing behind. Al, the kids, his mother, his brothers and their wives.

This is when I was shaken. Steve, Al’s youngest brother, walked by my pew almost uncontrollably crying. Of course he would. It’s normal. There’s no shame in a man crying at a time like that.

I was stunned by the sight. Absolutely stunned. I saw Al cry. I saw other family members cry. I saw people I knew and did’nt know cry. I cried at times.

So why did it affect me so much to see Steve cry? I’ve thought of this event many times since then and I’m no closer to an answer than I was the first time I tried to figure this all out.

I just don’t know.

I just looked at the title of this entry again. “Until we meet again”. I just realized that it means more than just “Felicia, I’ll see ya’ later”. It can mean until the next time that some event makes us, forces us to look at more than what meets the eye. We’re here. We’re not here.

The duality of existence.

Life has to go on. Living is good. Life is good. Remembering the life that has just ended can be sad but By GOD it can be very good. 

There just might be something to those words “Until we meet again”. Maybe.

Peace, where is thy sting?

Peace is more than just the absence of war. Exploration of this peace will take some time.

What in the wide, wide world of destruction do I mean when it comes to “war”?

For some reason I thought that the 1991 Gulf War was going to be the defining event of my adult life. Mister Levittown was wrong. It turned out to be the events of Sptember 11th and it’s aftermath. That’s right my peeps that means Iraq. What a journey in the sand to follow.

Where was Jim?

Yesterday (Saturday) I went over to Al’s place to see the family and whomever else that would drop by after Felicia’s death. There was family, friends I knew as well as people I had never seen before. We all had one thing in common: we loved Felicia.

Al and the kids were doing well. I guess the relief of the end of Felicia’s suffering was sustaining them.

I did have one question: where was Jim when his mother died?

When Felicia died Al and their daughter Anna were both present. Steve had left just a little while after I did. Jim, I found out, was at home.

When Al called to let Jim and Loretta (Al’s mom) know that Felicia had passed away Jim said he wanted to go for a walk. Al said on Saturday that Jim walked to a park nearby that his mother took him to often when he was a very young boy. I never knew about the importance of that park.

It struck me that the first thing my young friend had to do was go to a place that held a lot of significance for him and his Mom. I guess she loved this particular park and Jimmy came to love it too.

But that is just conjecture on my part.

Jim seemed absolutely fine on Saturday. Jimmy seemed like “Jimmy”. The funeral is on Wednesday. I’m sure he’ll cry. I know I will.

At least I had the answer to my question. On a cold winter’s night he was standing at a place that his mother loved. Always a nice thing to do.

My friend died tonight.

It was your average everyday kind of Friday today. It’s wintertime but here in the Eastern Pennsylvania – Southern New Jersey area we’ve had an up and down type winter. Bitterly cold, 60 degree spring-like days and the usual winter mess in between. Very little snow. So far.

Which brings me to today. My best friend, Albert, lost his wife, Felicia, to a cancer that was first diagnosed in 1994. I had been at the St. Francis Medical Center for a few hours tonight visiting dear Felicia. She was ………. she was. My first past tense reference to that loving and kind woman. I hate past tense references. Damnable things. She was in the hospice facility at St. Francis since Monday night. Al told me that it has been a struggle ever since. He didn’t give details and quite frankly I wasn’t going to press him about it.

She was sleeping when I arrived. Large amounts of morphine will do that I guess. Her brother was there. A neighbor friend as well. Al was at home getting a shower and something to eat. He came back about 8:30 or so. A little after that his brother Steve and their cousin Sal walked in the door. I forgot to mention that Al and Felicia’s daughter and one of her friends were there as well. I don’t know where their son was.

At what time I don’t know but at one point Steve, Sal and myself went to the kitchen that’s used by visiting families to make some coffee. We hung out there for about 15-20 minutes discussing politics and sports. After awhile Al joined us. Felicia was being tended to by some nurses. Was it really necessary for a Pennsylvania congressman to vote AGAINST a resolution congratulating the New York Giants for winning the Super Bowl?

How much of a mistake would it be if Barack Obama won the nomination and had Hillary Clinton be his Vice-President? Do you believe Roger Clemens or the trainer? The questions of life.

It’s 12:23am here on the east coast and having reviewed what I’ve written for the 14th time I realized that I haven’t put down one reason why Felicia was such a great gal.

Just about every time I would tell her something new in my life she would be so engaged in talking with me I always got the feeling that in her mind “nobody else exists right now because I’m talking to Georgie. He’s my focus and by God I’ve got to find out what bit of juicy information he has about his life”.

The total attention she would give to you was just that: total. My friends, that is love.

I got home about 10:30 or so tonight from the hospital after having left there about 10. I checked in with my friend The Saint at his part-time radio gig. Not to worry America he’s still rockin’ that 75 to death demographic.

The call came at 10:40pm.

Al said that she passed away peacefully. She moved her head to the side a little and then she was gone.

He told me the mundane things about not needing to come back to the hospital and he’ll call me about other details later on Saturday.

He didn’t start to breakdown until he began to tell me about how the suffering was finally over for Felicia.

Felicia was only 51. Tragically short to be sure but all of us in her husband’s family got her for 23 of those years. We were blessed.

On a strictly personal level I would’ve loved to have known her for another 23 years but the real tragedy would’ve been not to have known her at all.

My dear Felicia, I love you and I miss you and you were the best. 

Many people lost a friend tonight.

Welcome to the world as seen by misterlevittown. You may need stronger glasses.

To blog or not to blog. For that is truly the question in the early 21st century. After being beaten mercilessly by my sister-in-law I decided to join in on this new fangled way of expression. It was either do this or get the fecal matter beaten out of me. I chose to start using the keyboard.

Only time will tell if I made the right decision. Besides, I really did’nt want to use a whole roll of toilet paper to clean up the potential mess if I chose poorly. My brother’s wife IS that tough!